I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Operation Purity has been aborted
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
