Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
