So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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