Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
