have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
