The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
