belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
