Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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