went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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