Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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