If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
