I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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