I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
We have so much sex to catch up on
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
