I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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