i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
