do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
