fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
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