I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
