Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
