Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize