omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Life is so much better after having sex.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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