That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
