They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
