if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
