the day after is always just damage control
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
