On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
we're making bets on your personal life
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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