I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize