I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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