I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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