I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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