Walk of Shame. In a state park.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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