Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize