i just google imaged poop.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
