I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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