I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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