How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
