i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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