Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
its liver damage thursday
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
