i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize