do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize
