I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize
