I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
