Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Randomize
