He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
