I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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