Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
