And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
