It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
We need a shit load of segways right now
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
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