I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
