please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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