I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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